Poor Jimmy Tong (Jackie Chan). All this
cab driver wanted to do, was to say 'Hi' to a pretty
gallery owner that he's got a huge crush on. Still. Do you honestly think he is able to carry
out this very simple task all by himself?
Ha! Like sushi he can!
Ha! Like sushi he can!
However, what Jimmy is able to do, is get hired to chauffeur around a super-smooth super-spy called Clark Devlin (Jason Isaacs), who's someone that gets knocked into a coma by saboteurs not so long thereafter.
Yeah. No kidding. This very surprising turn of events is very shocking indeed. Right? But is it as shocking as when Jimmy puts on
Clarks hi-tech tuxedo, and is
bestowed with the gift of agility and hindsight? Moreover, is it as shocking as when Jimmy is then requested by one of Clark's
college in the CSA, Del Blaine (Jennifer Love Hewitt), to track down the
saboteur in question, Dietrich Banning (Ritchie Coster)?
doesn't know that Clark is in a coma, or that Jimmy is
currently posing as him either. Nonetheless, together. they try their best to track down Dietrich, and figure
out how he is planning to pollute the populous with water that somehow dehydrates.
Yep. That's correct. I said 'water that dehydrates'. Plus a number of other different words about this adventure spring to mind as well! But I won't tell you what they are. Oh no. Mainly due to the fact that when both Jimmy and
attempt to track down Dietrich, they fall's flat on they're collective ass's,
and it all goes tits-up when the funk is extracted from their endeavors.
Still, that's most probably why what next transpires all kicks off when two inexperienced super-spy's are caught in the act. As the CSA is chopped - trousers are dropped - suits eventually clash - and the bad guys can't help but make a very big splash.
Now before I say whatever it is I'm about to say about 'The Tuxedo', I'd like you to know that I'm a big fan of Jackie Chan, I want to shag Jennifer Love Hewitt, and I don't mind this genre of action-comedy either. Therefore, it is with a very heavy heart, I must state for the record that this movie is a mixed bag of odds and sods, that felt very flat in its execution.
Alright, before I get carried away with my 'Tuxedo' bashing, I think it best if I spill some filmic-facts next, OK? (1) This film was released on
the 27th of September, 2002, and made
$104,391,623 dollars back at thw box-office, out of it $60 million dollar budget. (2) There was a chimp in a suit and a hat at the films premiere. (3) To date, this has been the only film
Kevin Donovan ever directed. (4) One of the screenwriters associated with this
flick, Michael J. Leeson, wrote for the hit American sit-coms, 'The Cosby Show'
and 'Taxi', as well as devised the film-scripts for the movies 'The War of the
Roses' and 'The Survivors' [click here for review]. (5) The City Hall in , posed as the 'CSA
Headquarters' in this picture. Whilst the 'high-tech super-rifle' is really a 'scoped-competition
air-rifle' made by 'Steyr'. (6) Jason Isaacs first film role was as a market trader
for the 1994 Jude Law film, 'Shopping'. (7) If you look very closely at the scene where Jimmy goes through Mister Devlin's address book, you
can see the made-up phone numbers for Norman Schwarzkopf, Claudia Schiffer, Stephen
Sondheim, and George M. Steinbrenner III. (8) Jennifer
Love Hewitt was tuned down for the role of Tricia Jones in the 1995 Kevin Smith
movie 'Mallrats' [click here for the review] (9) Film critique, Roger Ebert,
said that this comedy was 'silly beyond comprehension', and 'even if it weren't
silly, it would still be beyond comprehension'. (10) Jackie Chan's real name is
Kong-sang Chan. In English 'Kong Sang' means 'Born in Toronto,
Canada Hong Kong'. (11) You can see comedian,
Bill Murray, briefly in the final gallery scene acting as a customer.
Listen, I would have really have loved to have praised 'The Tuxedo' more than I actually did. Honestly. A part of me is dying to say that Jackie was on top form, Jennifer was a star, and that the overall production was out of this world. But I can't. The only things I did like where a few set-pieces, James Browns cameo, Jackie's presence, plus, of course, this...
Blooper city, you have to love it, huh? Bless you Jackie.
THE RATING: C