9 Jan 2013

NEW GUARDIANS #15

By David Lee Andrews   Posted at  05:30   TONY BEDARD

[ BARGAINS ARE GOOD
I've never liked the look of greedy fools. They remind me of barren and desolate schools. Not a nice place to stay. It smell's of decay. And never once do they play by the rules. Hmm? That reminds me to contact the Writer: Antony Bedard; the Artist: Aaron Kuder; and the Publisher: DC Comics in January 2013.

So what’s the STORY morning glory?
Simply put: 'The Need for Greed' is an answer-driven adventure-story comprised of question, after question, after question. Such as:
  • Are the Zamaron's loving the sight of the Third Army killing off the Spider Guild?
  • How does Arkillo brush his teeth?
  • Is Star Sapphire still horny for Hal Jordan?
  • When did Sayd first fall in love with Ganthet?
  • What does Larfleeze want for teaching Kyle Rayner how to use his power?
  • Why in the name of monkey-poo does the Third Army spoil Kyle's lesson, by killing off one of the people I've mentioned previously?

Oh! To be continued when a Ganthets got to do, what a Ganthets got to do...   

What is the most memorable SENTENCE OR CONVERSATION spoken in this issue?
I liked the bit when Star Sapphire was probing Larfleeze's mind, giving the rest of the gang more than enough time to say...

ARIKILLO: What's she doing?
SAYD: Plumbing the depth of his soul.
KYLE: Shouldn't take long, then.

Ha! Not only was this pithy patch of dialogue informative, but it was very funny as well.

What was the BEST thing about this issue?
Please tell me that Aaron Kuder is the regular artist on this book. Please do. Pretty please with knob's on! I'll be your best friend, ha!

Seriously though, Aaron draws a really mean looking book. His characters are bold and full of life. His panel layouts are dynamic and clean. And his compositions are just spot on perfect.

Tie him down DC. Don't let him go anywhere.

What was the WORST thing about this issue?
My main gripe with this issue was its flimflam structure, with its overall through-line jumping around from scene to scene to scene, as if it were guided by someone with ADHD.

Also, another thing I wasn't too happy about; was Arkillo's consistent moaning. If he doesn't think Kyle is up for the job, why follow him around?

What was the most INNOVATIVE thing about this issue?
Although I wasn't very keen on the 'free spirited' structure of this story, the closing scene more than made up for this fact. Not only did it build up the overall tension when Kyle briefly 'lost control' of Larfleeze's power, but it also showed pathos in Sayd's closing statement 'Tell Ganthet I loved him'.

Ohhhhh! I can feel the shivers shooting up my spine as soon as I typed that.   

If you had to CAST TWO CHARACTERS in this comic book, who would they be and why?
SAYD: Still in plant-based casting-call month, dear reader, and still in the right frame of mind to cast this small-blue lady as a small-blue flower -- called the 'Scilla Siberica'. Pretty, aren't they?

ARIKILLO: As for this ugly looking sod on the other hand, why not cast him as a 'Sunflower'? They're both large, bold, have pointy bits to them, and appear slightly menacing.

What QUOTE could you use to sum-up this story?
'Please Sir, Can I Go To The Bathroom? I want a Wii' -- many pupils across the world

If this issue were a MOVIE, an OBJECT, or a piece of MUSIC, what would that be and why? 
If you think about it for a moment or two, this adventure is about urging someone into becoming greedy, right? Therefore, why not measure it up to the Richard Pryor / John Candy comedy 'Brewster's Millions'?




FINAL thoughts...
Now I know that I've already mentioned this in the past, but what's going to happen to Kyle after he's become 'Captain Menopause'? Is he going to spin-off into his own book, leaving this one in limbo? Is he going to revert back to normal, as if nothing had happened? Is he going to snuff it, and get mentioned from time to time in passing? Or is he going to still be alive, loose this power, and then join a circus?

Well, that's all the combinations on offer, huh? Leave. Normal. Die. Or Circus. And I cannot help but wonder what path he will take once the moment arrives.

Personally speaking, I hope that Kyle keeps his 'menopausal powers', and finds a way of coping with them with his chums, 'The New Guardians', help. For me, this type of tale will give this series some definition and some direction, so us -- the readers -- will know where we stand on this book.

What do you feel about this matter, dear reader? Drop us a spam when you can, OK?

MARKS out of 10? 8.8

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