WOLVERINE #317

[ I DREAM OF DISCOUNTS ] 

To dream, perchance, to sleep. Don't fret, this series isn't deep. In fact it's coming to an end. Wolverine's going to be staying with a friend. And someone who likes to chirp, 'beep-beep'. But then again, maybe it'll be Writer: Chris Bunner; Artist: Paul Pelletier; and Publisher: Marvel Comics in January 2013.

So what’s the STORY morning glory?

Many-many years ago, Wolverine tricked the 'Covenant' into believing he that killed the all powerful telepath, known as the Dreaming Maiden. Today though -- in this third and final part of a story entitled 'Covenant' -- he does something else to them. But is it:

1. Find them.
2. Fight them.
3. Ignore them.
4. Dream about them.
5. Reunite them.
6. Cancel his series and start another one sometime in 2013.

Go on. Have a guess. The Dreaming Maiden would have told you the answer, if she didn't fall to bits in this issue. Also, most of Wolverine ex's could have done the same thing, if they weren't too busy putting stuff back together again.

Ahh! Bless 'em. 

What is the most memorable SENTENCE OR CONVERSATION spoken in this issue?

There were two very memorable pieces of dialogue for me to read in this issue. The first piece was Wolverines opening monologue; when he says to himself...

'When you have been around for as long as I have -- when you've run with the Avengers and the X-men and the X-Force amongst others -- you grow accustomed to travelling in strange circles. But leading a group comprised mostly of my pissed-off ex-girlfriends through a haunted swap is still downright unsettling'.

Ha! Funny, isn't it? Just like the second piece I want to mention; when Seraph's says to Wolverine...

'What is wrong with you and women, Logan? When are you going to learn that every time you unzip your pants, you get yourself in a world of trouble?'. 

What was the BEST thing about this issue?

Although it came across as a throw-away scene, I did like reading the flashback sequence where Logan told the Covenant that he killed the Dreaming Maiden. Not only was this section beautifully illustrated by the artist, Paul Pelletier, but it also gives you something to reference when you see the Covenant members later on in this is tale.

What was the WORST thing about this issue?

Why did Logan tell 'Seraph's Angels' to stay behind at the swamp; when a couple of pages later they came rushing to his rescue by whim of fate?

No. Didn't make any sense to me what so ever. And came across as nothing more than padding within the scheme of things. 

What was the most INNOVATIVE thing about this issue?

Now I'm sure you know by now that this is the last issue of this particular Wolverine series. But in a strange way, it doesn't feel like a final issue at all. No. Even when you read that last bit where Wolverine asks for his memories to be 're-aligned'.

Strange that. Strange in a good way of course.

If you had to CAST TWO CHARACTERS in this comic book, who would they be and why?

WOLVERINE: Still sticking to this month's plant-based casting call theme, dear reader, and I'm in the mood to compare Logan to an Olive Tree. They're both long-lasting, rough around the edges, and preserves well in hotter climes. 

THE DREAMING MAIDEN: Did you know that there was a plant actually called a 'Sleeping Plant'? Granted, its real name is 'Mimosa Pudica', and it's only been given this title because it's leaves folds inwards when you touch it. Still, nice to know, huh? And nice to compare to this dream-like maiden too.

What QUOTE could you use to sum-up this story?

'I have a dream' -- Martin Luther King.

If this issue were a MOVIE, an OBJECT, or a piece of MUSIC, what would that be and why? 

Mainly because of the dream-like vibe running through this story-line, I feel compelled to compare it to the Mama Cass song 'Dream a Little Dream of Me'.

Yawn! I'm tiered now!

FINAL thoughts...

Dear Marvel Comics,

What the f*ck do you think you're doing? I was enjoying this series. Honestly I was. Then one day you came along and replaced the main character, swapped the creative team, changed the numbering, brought back the main character, presented another creative team, before finally, cancelling this title.

Are you on drugs or something? If it wasn't bad enough you can't count. Now you have the gumption to reboot this series just because DC did it to their titles a year or so ago.

Come on. Don't be so childish. If DC jumped into the river, would you jump into the river? If DC danced around naked in the heart of Manhattan, would you dance around naked in the heart of Manhattan? If DC starting pimping off their characters, would you... errr... never mind.

Anyway, unlike what I did with the Hulk title, I will still continue reviewing one of the up and coming Wolverine titles. Not sure which one yet. I have to think about that. But if you have any suggestions, spam me, OK? 

MARKS out of 10? 8.7