Hey, pal. Can you keep a secret? Yeah! Yes you can! Good. Then for the love of all things Kirby, please don't tell it to Scott Lobdell, Art Thibert, and Brett Booth, OK? Or else they'll tell it to the Publisher: DC Comics; and all hell will break loose in January, 2014. The end is nigh. The end is orange.

To QUOTE John Connor: 'I knew it. I knew it was coming. But this is not the future my mother warned me about. And in this future, I don't know if we can win this war'.

In this issue of Teen Titans, entitled 'You Can't Go Home Again', we are finally presented with 'Bart Allen's' very perplexing origins.

You see, whilst he's being reprimanded by his futuristic captors, we and the rest of the gang get to witness how this reluctant orphan tried to shield his sister from the malignant authorities, before inadvertently transforming himself from nomad, to courier, to the fastest killer alive.

Despite whatever else I may come up with down below, folks, with hand on my heart I really did enjoy reading this tonal yet adventurous origin story. The tale in itself was a good one to follow, plus I did get a kick out of how it was told in a very no-nonsense and individual manner.

Furthermore, the art was very dynamic-looking on the page, and in a round about way the whole God damn thing reminded me of... no... I leave that particular point for my comparison methinks. Ha!

I suppose the main problem I had with this issue is that in a very blatant fashion it completely dismissed the first Bart Allen I've always known and loved. So regrettably, gone are the days of Bart messing about with Wally, or kicking about with Max, and here to stay is a very dark character with one hell of an itch to scratch. Also, I was none too keen on how this story ended either. Why should the Titans pose their own personal judgement's on Bart, when none of them have ever walked in his very down trodden shoes?

No, dear readers! I won't explain to you within this section why I've compared this story to the theme tune heard in 'Terminator 2'. I'm feeling a bit lazy at the moment to do that. But I tell you what I will do; I'll direct you to read the following section to understand my strange reasoning.

Now if you tilt your head sideways, down a bottle of whisky in a single gulp, and completely disregard Bart's speedy powers, I'm sure that like me, you can't help but compare Bar... err... whatever his name is now... to John Connor: from 'The Terminator' series of films. Well, let's face it. They both lived in a future controlled by an oppressive regime, and they'd do anything to buck the then current trends. Also, they both feel over-protective towards a female sibling, they've both used time-travel to get out of their dire situations, and they both sport the same f*cking silly hairstyle.   

So there you have it, folks. The untold origin of Bart Allen finally revealed.

How do you feel now it's eventually been presented? Slightly miffed, because it's discarded the Bart of old? Slightly excited, because it does present something new for him to explore? Or would you be a bit like me? A combination of slightly miffed and slight excited; and uncertain if this new direction is a good thing for Bart or not.

Then again, no matter how any of us might feel, for the time being the New 52 is here to stay. So for those of you who are more open-minded, let's at least enjoy the ride, shall we? Life is too short to grumble about how a character is being changed for the sake of change. Plus you have to remember, what's one's mans 'New 52' is another mans 'Crisis on Infinite Earths'.

Nuff said.