|[ CASH IN ON CONVERGENCE ]|
To QUOTE Willy Shakespeare: 'God has given you one face, and you make yourself another'.
Roll up, roll up, roll up, and come gather round and watch the next part of Convergence. A part, I might add, that involves a number of disjointed scenarios that may or may not be related to one another.
I mean, will Grayson be able to talk Telos around to his way of thinking? A more humane way of thinking! And if he can, does it in any way shape or form aide the other heroes of Earth 2 catching up with the rogue demi-God, Deimos?
Oh! And while I'm on the subject of Deimos, what's he got to do with Travis Morgan, Skartaris, plus the captured Time Masters under guard by Shakira?
No. Not the singer Shakira. The other one who's... errr... no... I best not say anymore. Or else the last page villain won't be able to answer these questions for us next month.
Oh boy! To be continued...
You know how in a much larger story-line you get a chapter which acts as a bridge from one part of the plot to the other? Well, this is just such a chapter. Essentially, it kind of defines the previous part of the plot, and then joins it up with the next part of the plot. Acting, in very real term's, as a story-device within a story-device, showing us that from here on in things are really going to hit the fan.
Now by this stage we've all understood the underlining point to Convergence (lets play about with the old, and set them against the new), as well it's eventual outcome (fixing any snags DC had with the New 52). Yet having said that, there still needs to be an actual story, doesn't there? At the moment, the basic story-line presented comes across as a hodgepodge of ideas that doesn't seem to have a direct focus.
For instance, one part of the plot (which I really did like) involved Dick Grayson talking to Telos about his humanity, hoping to turn him around to a more logical way of thinking. Where as another part of the plot (which I didn't mind following either) involved Deimos defining his role within this event (thanks to some Stella visuals by Stephen Segovia), whilst explaining a little bit about the Time Masters involvement as well.
However, where this story falls flat on its ass...
... has to do with everything else it has on offer. The overall narrative structure was so disjointed I didn't know what was going on from one moment to the next. Worst still, not only was this instalment less focused than usual, it also had that plodding tone as if 'exposition had to be said', just so we could get from one scene to another scene in as few a steps as possible.
Now a good example of this can be clearly seen in that sequence where Yolanda and Shakira have a fight. And the reason why I say this, dear reader, is because once the scene is over and done with, you will notice that the scene in itself doesn't accomplish anything, except showing two ladies having a fist fight.
There is a character in this comic book called Shakira. And because of this, I feel like I should honour this fact by playing one of the real Shakira's songs. You know. Something like 'Whenever, Wherever'. Just for its cinematic feel, and its small and humble breasts (I think, Ha!)
I was originally going to compare this adventure to a driving instructor, because in it I kept on reading sections of dialogue where one person kept on telling other people what to do. But on second thoughts, I thought, 'Hey! Who else keeps on telling people what to do?'. Then it struck me! BANG! My mother does such a thing.
And yes, before you ask, my mother does look an awful lot like Shirley MaClaine.
At the very end of this issue Deimos comes face to face with someone I'm sure will be a pivotal player in this whole Convergence story-line. So, just for fun -- Yeah. Right -- how about you trying to guess who it is out of the following nine options?
- Bambi: Yes. I know his mother is dead and he looks real cute. But behind the eyes is danger I say. True danger!
- Brainiac: No. Not the stupid looking one from the sixties with the green bald head and the pink disco top. The other one. The evil looking one who kills for the sake of killing.
- Captain Picard: Hey! Come on DC. Make it so.
- That albino girl from the Disney film, Frozen: Let it go.
- Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs: Hi-hoe. Hi-hoe. It's off to work we go.
- Snoop Dog: Say what you bad moe-foe?
- A pimp: Where's my hoe?
- King Louis the whatever: Who bombed my chateaux?
- Luke Skywalker: Arrhhh! Nuuuooo!