TITANS #13

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[ LOVE THOSE BARGAINS
Everyone who's a low down dirty traitor please put up your hands! Go on, put em' up so I can see those little pinkies waving in the air. Then once you've done that, afterwards you might like to check out the following story created by Dan Abnett, V Ken Marion, and published by DC Comics. It's August, 2017, and it's time for the Titans in review.

TO QUOTE P. G. Wodehouse: 'Memories are like mulligatawny soup served in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them'.

THE REVIEW:
When this book begins we are presented with a fairly lengthy sequence which depicts the Titans infiltrating Alton Laboratories in order to retrieve Karen Duncan's stolen memories. As some of you may recall, one issue prior to the 'Lazarus Contract', or issue 10 to be more precise, the nefarious HIVE managed to pluck them away from her so they could sell them on to the highest bidder. But before they could do that, the Titans have taken it upon themselves to break into their HQ, beat up the bad guys, and try to get away with Karen's memories still intact. 

Unfortunately for them, however, not so long after they arrive they're stopped in their tracks by a timid looking man named Mr Binder. Well, when I say he looks timid, in all fairness he starts off looking timid until he transforms himself into a very versatile super-powered villain. In fact, his power levels are so versatile (and adaptable to use), he makes quick work of the Titans, kicking them into touch, one, by one, by one, regardless of what Wally, Donna, Karen, Dick, and the rest of the team try to do. 

Don't worry though, as they eventually manage to turn the tide of battle, but only when Wally West finally cottons on to a new power he has at his disposal, a new power which literally stops time for those people who surround him.

Obviously I don't want to say any more than that for the sake of spoilers, although, that said, what I can say is that this was one of those issues which was both good and bad in equal measures.

Now a good example of this can be seen in the artwork provided by V Ken Marion. Even though his layouts were cleanly illustrated, easy to follow, and conveyed emotion, action, and pathos whenever it was needed, at the same time it was far too pedestrian by default, going so far as to say that sometimes it felt like Ken was channelling the one time Silver Surfer artist, Ron Lim (take that however you so wish).

Along similar lines I can also say the same thing about how the dramatic scenes were interspersed among the fighting sequences. I mean, did Roy really need to act jealous over Wally while he and Donna were both recuperating from their injuries? Or for that matter, did Lilith need to tell Garth about one of the team being a traitor in the midst of battle? No, I don't think so, and I say this because the Titans are supposed to be a professional fighting unit and not a collection of hormonal teenagers who can't prioritize their feelings. Honestly, at times these sparse dramatic pauses started to annoy me because I felt they disrespected the characters by diluting their personalities.

Seriously, would you stop and have a nice little chat while you were in a middle of a fight? No, of course you wouldn't, especially if your opponent could duplicate himself, fire laser beams from his hands, fly, etc, etc, etc, so why should the Titans be any different? And that, my friend, is my main problem with this issue. Everything else was passable at worst, minus the conclusion, with the best bits in the entire book mainly focused on Dan Abnett defining the personality of each character.

You see, despite my criticism, at the end of the day a story was told, a fight was fought, and most importantly of them all the characters were able to express themselves, even if it was done at the most inappropriate times. Currently my particular favorites are Wally (I like his new powers), Karen (she seems sassy), and of course Lilith is starting to grow on me too (much more than she did in the past). As for the rest of the team, yeah, they also seem pretty well defined, although it would be nice to see how well they can develop in the near future.

THE MUSIC:
At face value this story is about fighting to save someone's memories. So with that said, how could I not musically match it up with the Adele song, 'Don't You Remember'?




THE COMPARISON:
Yes. That's right. You've seen the picture, so now I'm going to compare this comic book to an avocado. And why would I want to do such a thing? It's simple really. It's because avocados are good for the memory... scientifically proven.

THE CONCLUSION:
Halfway through this adventure, Mal Duncan goes to someone who may be able to help him find his wife's memories. So, for the sake of amnesia, let's see if you can figure out who this person is out of the following eight candidates? Could it be…

  • Daredevil: The Man Without Fear. 
  • Gnarrk: The Hunter Who Chases Deer.
  • Tom Cruise: Who's Mummy Is A Bit Queer.
  • Batman: The Orphan Without Cheer. 
  • Kim Kardashian: The Woman Who Has A Lovely Rear. 
  • That Actor From 'An Officer and a Gentleman': I Think His Name Is Richard Gere.
  • William Shakespeare: You know, he wrote King Lear. 
  • An Alcoholic: He Drinks Too Much Beer.
Nuff said.

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