SAVAGE WOLVERINE #8

[ IS THERE A SALE BEHIND ME? ] 

Before Electra became the world-class assassin she's known as today, she once worked at a Greek restaurant, waiting on tables. Yeah. Straight up! I saw her there round about the same time Zeb Wells worked as a piano playing nudist; Joe Madureira worked as a blind-folded speedway driver; whilst the Publisher: Marvel Comics, did something with string. It was in September, 2013.

Using GENERAL terms, answer the following 4 questions about this FINAL PART of 'The Arbiters'.

• WHAT'S THE MAIN THRUST OF THIS TALE: Whilst the Arbiters pass their final judgement on a captured Wolverine, his bulbous boss, Wilson Fisk, has to fend off his deceased ex-wife, Vanessa.  
• ARE THE MAIN OBJECTIVES ACHIEVED: Let's just say a lot of blood was spilt, OK? No thanks to Elektra, of course. The stuck-up cow! Ha!
• ANYTHING ELSE HAPPEN: Yes. I read this entire issue whilst having a dump. Two lumps, not one.
• HOW DOES THIS STORY END: With an ending and a beginning rolled up into one.

All in all, what is the most memorable SENTENCE OR CONVERSATION spoken in this issue?

Picture the scene. Wolverine is strung up like a kipper by the Arbiters, and during his subsequent torture, he says to them...

'I'm going to make you a promise, bub... you do not know what I really am'.

Ohhh! Very ominous words indeed. The only thing he needs is a poncho and a squint in his eye and old Logan will be a spit for Clint Eastwood.

What are the BEST bits about this issue?

(+) I did like the way Joe Mad's artwork in this issue was very gruesome and stark in execution. To me, it came across grungy in places -- horror-like even -- boarding on the baroque and the obtuse.

(+) Something else that I thought was very atmospheric about this adventure was how the Arbiters spoke to their opponents. Now maybe this had something to do with their fractured diction or inverted lettering. Nonetheless, whatever the case may be, it still worked for yours truly.  

(+) One of the most intriguing aspects about this title is how versatile and encompassing Wolverine is as a character. During the last arc he was depicted as a comical brute. Whilst in this arc he was depicted as a nomadic ally. What next, huh?  Roguish mutant?

(+) Now without giving too much away, in essence, this story-line was a 'mystical test' to see who has the 'cojones' needed to be the next 'Hand' boss. Hmmm. I'm not too sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing if truth be told. Let's wait and see if it sticks, shall we?

What are the WORST bits about this issue?

(-) What the hell was Elektra doing in this issue? Nothing. That's what. All she did was stand around and pretend to be a 'Goth-like assassin'. Tut-tut-tut. Shame on you, buddy-Zeb. She should have had some time to shine in this story because she's a great character when treated with some respect.  

(-) Oh! While I'm talking about fleeting appearances, there wasn't enough Spiderman either. Boo-Hoo! Why!!!! I thought this arc was going to be a team-up between the three of them!

Choose TWO CHARACTERS out of this comic book, and then compare them to A REAL-LIFE HISTORICAL FIGURE.

AL CAPONE AS WILSON FISK: Hey! This is a no-brainer, huh? Heck, I'm sure that back in the day when the Kingpin was created, he was modeled after this Chicago crime boss. Hand's down.

BILJANA PLAVSIC AS VANESSA FISK: OK. I know that Biljana isn't very dead, or that Vanessa isn't very political. But hey! They do have the same hairstyle and are as crocked as a door knob. So that's something I suppose.

What QUOTE would be appropriate to sum-up this story?

'Knavery and flattery are blood relations' -- Abraham Lincoln

What SONG, THEME-TUNE, or MELODY, would complement this tale, as well as add and extra dimension to it by default?

'I WANNA HOLD YOUR HAND' BY THE BEATLES: Hold on a God damn minute before you start groaning, folks. On a conceptual level this issue is about how Wilson Fisk wants to take hold of 'The Hand'. Therefore, he wants to 'hold the hand', right? Huh? What do you mean f*ck off'? OK then. I will.

ANYTHING Else?

As I mentioned up above, Spiderman wasn't around very as much as I would have liked him to have been in this installment. But where was he, huh? Where could he have been all this time? What about...

• Shopping for red and blue fabric.
• Having a good old 'chin wag' with Stan Lee about the good old days.
• Browsing for porn.
• Proactively ignoring DC's Villains Month like I did.
• Building a skyscraper out of jam.
• Messing about on the 800 titles he's already on.
• Appearing in his very own musical, live on Broadway.
• Debating with the director, Marc Webb, about the direction of 'The Amazing Spiderman 2'.
• Masturbating.

Anyway. That's enough of my bullsh*t for this month, folks. All I have left to say is that this issue of 'Savage Wolverine' wasn't a bad read. The art was atmospheric. The story was fair. And the only thing that let it down was its focus and its lack of character.

Nuff said.