WHAT NOT TO SAY AFTER A FUNERAL

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Grim Reaper Cartoon Picture the scene. You've just attended a funeral of a loved one who's recently passed away, and now, during the wake, you say something f*cking stupid. Yeah. It can happen at times. I once knew of a chap who was so bloody idiotic during these sorts of occasions, he said... 


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  • You got to laugh, don’t ya? 
  • Shame about the car! Huh?
  • And her breasts were still pert, right up to the very end! 
  • Are you interested in changing energy suppliers? 
  • Is the coffin sound proof? 
  • Did he ever tell you about the money I lent him? 
  • All I’m saying is that I preferred it if the vicar was a transsexual! 
  • Do you know it takes seven years before the body turns to mush... so theirs still time to dig him up! 
  • I never realized that you could die with a smile on your face. It must have been the hookers! 
  • You didn't rent his clothing, did you? 

Clown Funeral

  • Hey! Why didn't the vicar mention the womanizing, the drug taking, or the paedophile charges during his sermon? 
  • Are you interested in getting a low phone tariff? 
  • Theirs just something about funerals which turns me on! 
  • Have you met the person who killed your husband? No! Well, I’ll just go and get him, because he’s eating all of the bloody h'orderves. 
  • It just goes to show, that no matter how many drugs you take, you’ll always be buried low. 
  • I think that I may have dropped my wallet in the coffin, so is their any chance...? 
  • Just think of all the money that you can save now on shopping! 
  • Are you interested in life insurance? 

Huh? What's that? You want to hear more, folks? Alright then. Try this on for size. But nothing else afterwards. Tut-Tut-Tut!


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