CAPTAIN AMERICA'S DATING PROFILE (THE SAM WILSON VERSION)

This month, Disney will be releasing the thirty-fifth film associated with the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Entitled, 'Captain America: Brave New World', the aforementioned film was directed by Julius Onah and stars Anthony Mackie, Harrison Ford, Danny Ramirez, and Shira Haas. So, to celebrate its release, I thought that it would be a jolly good idea to take a look at the dating profile for the titular character. Here 👇, check this out.

Personal information:
Full name: Samuel Thomas Wilson / Age: Old enough to kick your ass / Occupations: Avenger, Trauma counselor, and United States Air Force Pararescueman / Locations: Delacroix, Louisiana, and Washington, D.C. / Relationship requirements: Someone who doesn't want to kill me / Longest relationship: I don't know and I don't care

Distinguishing features:
Height: With or without my wings? / Weight: Right for my height / Build: Athletic / Hair color: Black / Eye color: Brown

Other attributes:
Do you like animals? Yes, but I especially love fried chicken / Do you drink? Sure, but I don't drink as much as the late, great, Tony Stark / Do you want children? No comment / Do you consume drugs? Not today / Do you drive a car? Yes, and I can also fly

Favorite:
TV show: 'DuckTales' / Song: 'Blackbird' by the Beatles / Actor: Russell Crowe / Singer: Drake / Architect: Sir Christopher Wren / Film: 'The Birds' / Color: Black / Meal: Fried chicken / Quote: 'The early bird catches the worm' - William Camden

Hobbies:
Flying. Dancing. Sailing. Preaching. Making plans. Kicking cans. Shaking hands. Talking in rhyme. Avoiding slime. Stopping crime. Helping those in need. Trying to breed. Knitting.

About me:
When you look at a picture of me, what do you see? Do you see a winged hero standing up for what he thinks is right? Or do you see a reluctant successor with a really nice ass? Well, if you presume any of these things, I'd say you're correct. In part, anyway, as my intentions are always noble and my ass is so, so fine that after I die, I plan to put it on display in a museum. Out of curiosity, what part of your body would you like to see displayed in a museum? Your brain? Your colon? Or would you prefer to flaunt something else for the sake of posterity? Whatever you decide, just keep in mind that I am an honest person and I don't play games with people. That's unless they want to play football or some other type of recreational sport.

First date:
I'm sure you can tell from my profile that I'm a pretty modest guy who's always open to suggestions. So, if you'd like to go somewhere romantic, our first date could begin in a posh restaurant and then end with us taking a leisurely stroll alongside a nearby canal. But if you prefer somewhere a bit more grounded, I can show you around my hometown of Delacroix, Louisiana, before taking you on a trip in my sister's fishing boat. So, what do you say? Fancy going out with me, Sam Wilson? Formerly known as the hero, the Falcon, but now, Captain America. Come on, let's go out and paint the town red, white, and blue. But we won't use lead-based paints as I hear they're bad for the environment.

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