PREDATOR'S DATING PROFILE

This month, Hulu will be releasing the sixth film in the Predator franchise, excluding the two crossover films from the Alien series. Aptly titled, 'Predator: Killer of Killers', the aforementioned animated film consists of three stories set in different eras, each depicting a Predator fighting against a different opponent, including a Viking, a ninja, and a World War II pilot. It was directed by Dan Trachtenberg and Micho Robert Rutare, and features the vocal talents of Lindsay LaVanchy, Louis Ozawa Changchien, and Rick Gonzalez. So, to celebrate its release, I thought that it would be a jolly good idea to take a look at the dating profile for one of the titular characters. Here 👇, check this out.

Personal information:
Name: F*ck knows / Age: Don't care / Occupation: Hunter / Location: Here / Relationship requirements: Somebody who can fight / Longest relationship: Sixty feet / Marital status: Single

Distinguishing features:
Height: Tall / Weight: Mind your own business / Build: Muscular / Hair color: Not applicable / Eye color: Yellow

Other attributes:
How ambitious are you? I'm very ambitious when it comes to killing / Do you drink? Yes, mainly with a straw / Do you want children? No / Do you consume drugs? Only when I'm wounded / Do you drive a car? I can operate a variety of vehicles, including cars

Favorite:
TV show: 'Dog the Bounty Hunter' / Song: 'Maneater' by Nelly Furtado / Actor: Alec Baldwin / Band: The Killers / Hunter: Hunter Biden / Film: 'The Deer Hunter' / Color: Is infrared a color? / Meal: Steak and kidney pie / Quote: 'Shhh. Be vewy vewy quiet, I'm hunting wabbits' - Elmer Fudd

Hobbies:
Stalking. Killing. Stabbing. Punching. Kicking. Shooting. Screaming. Collecting trophies. Utilizing technology. Orienteering. Scaring the living sh*t out of my intended target. Knitting and other types of needlework.

About me:
Day and night, for as long as I can remember, I have travelled from place to place in order to find and kill anyone I deem a worthy adversary. Sometimes I would kill a rival warrior, while at other times I'd kill an individual praised for their prowess. Either way, I kill, I kill, I kill until the day I am bested by an opponent and finally fade away. But before then, how would you like to go out on a date with me? Me, your friendly neighborhood Predator! I promise that I won't kill you straight away, and I'll guarantee you'll have a good time. So go on, take a chance. Or else, I will take your life.

First date:
Next week, I plan to travel to a remote village and kill a man who is said to be the best at playing ping-pong. My plan involves me arriving at the intended location and scouting the vicinity for a few hours. Once I've done that, afterwards, I will track down the target, find out his daily routine, and then chop his head off. So, if you would like to accompany me on my quest, we can meet up and discuss matters further. But please be warned, tardiness will not be tolerated, and I insist you bring your own weapons. I also insist that we have something to eat after we've terminated the target, preferably something inexpensive.

To see more character-based dating profiles, please feel free to click here to check out our section dedicated to all things love.