THE KARATE KID'S DATING PROFILE (THE LI FONG VERSION)

This month, Sony Pictures will be releasing the sixth film in The Karate Kid franchise. Entitled, 'Karate Kid: Legends', the aforementioned film was directed by Jonathan Entwistle and stars Jackie Chan, Ralph Macchio, and Ben Wang. So, to celebrate its release, I thought that it would be a jolly good idea to take a look at the dating profile for the titular character. Here 👇, check this out.

Personal information:
Full name: Li Fong / Age: Old enough to kick your ass / Occupation: Student / Location: New York City / Relationship requirements: Someone who doesn't want to beat me up / Longest relationship: I love my mother. Does that count?

Distinguishing features:
Height: It doesn't matter because I'm Asian / Weight: See the previous answer for my response / Build: Ditto / Hair color: Black / Eye color: Brown

Other attributes:
Do you like animals? Yes, either fried or boiled / Do you drink? I drink fizzy drinks or boba / Do you want children? I don't know at the moment / Do you consume drugs? Is MSG a drug? If so, oops / Do you drive a car? I can drive my foot up your ass

Favorite:
TV show: 'Cobra Kai' / Song: 'Gung-Ho' by Anthrax / Actor: Sammo Hung / Book: 'Yum Yum Dim Sum' by Amy Wilson Sanger / Drag queen: Sum Ting Wong / Film: 'Drunken Master' / Sport: MMA / Meal: Rice / Quote: 'Emotional damage' - Steven He

Hobbies:
Fighting. Frowning. Ironing my hair. Mathematics. Geometry. Calculus. Reading manga. Watching anime. Eating rice. Slurping noodles. Twirling chopsticks. Pretending that I'm related to Bruce Lee. Rebelling against Asian stereotypes. Ping-pong.

About me:
Hello. My name is Li Fong, and I'm a student who has recently moved from Beijing to New York City with my mother. I like to think that I'm a fairly modest person because my heart is pure and my intentions are always noble. But having said that, nobody's perfect, not even me, as I have some imperfections with my left ear, my right nostril, and my colon. I'm also a decent martial artist, and I can defend myself from anyone who dares to attack me. If you want to see me in action, then I suggest that you have a look at the video below. Trust me, you won't regret it. Or should I say... wegret?

First date:
As I'm a martial artist, I'd like our date to begin at a dojo where we can spar against each other in a one-on-one fight. Then once I've kicked the living sh*t out of you, afterwards, we can have something to eat. Something with rice, perhaps, or noodles, complemented with a selection of vegetables, meats, and sauces saturated with MSG. We can also go to the local library and read a good book. Or if you prefer, visit a team of accountants and help them with their work. Either way, let me know what you'd like to do and then we can make a decision. Heck, you can think of our date as a Chinese takeaway with benefits, wink!

To see more character-based dating profiles, please feel free to click here to check out our section dedicated to all things love.